A new look for Todd

There are few dancer accoutrements that are so universally reviled at glitter. You can tell by the aliases glitter, “Slut Dust”, “Clitty Litter”, and “Divorce Dust”. The basic problem with glitter is when one dancer wears glitter, all the dancers wear glitter. And occasionally some of the customers.. The stuff goes every where, including the customers. I’ve never been married so I never had to deal the “divorce dust” issue, but it has lead to a couple of embarrassing moments.

I try not to categorize people just because of their profession, but strip club owners can be some of the cheapest bastards on the face of the earth. They tend to cut corners on things like drink napkins, light bulbs, or furniture. I know when the club was having a good month because they would have a new bungee cord to pull the men’s room door closed. During bad months the door would just kind of hang there. If you want more privacy you need to buy more drinks.

Another favorite method of saving money owner’s employ is not turning on the heat. I’ve seen owners standing in jeans, sweat shirt, and coat thinking the heat is fine while the dancer dressed in a g-string and little else is freezing to death. I stopped by the club during the spring time. It was nice and warm during the days but the nights still got cold very quickly. It was one of those freezing nights in the club. I wore my black vest the entire time I was there.

The following morning I threw the same black vest on again and headed off to work. We were doing some testing on a display that was going to be installed in an ATM machine. If you visited a Bank of America ATM recently you were using the LCD module we we’re testing that day. On displays used outdoors we do a day light readability test. Basically you blast the display with light and make sure you can still read it. By blasting light I mean 100,000 lux. Most homes are lit at 150 lux. We’re talking a bank aircraft landing lights all pointed at small spot. Part of my job is to make sure the electronics works. Because of the heat generated by the lights we keep the optical lab as cool as possible between tests so I was keeping my vest on.

During the test I had stepped in front of the lights to check something when I heard laughter break out behind me. Then I heard “Holy shit Todd, that’s a new look for you”. I turned around confuse. “Dude, it’s your vest. You look like Liberace”. The back of my best was covered in glitter. In the test lights I twinkled like a planetarium exhibit. Apparently I had sat down in chair slathered in clitty litter. “Why didn’t you invited any of us along” one of the others guy quipped. One advantage of working in a sales and marketing group is you don’t have worry about people knowing you hang out in strip clubs. More than likely they are spending more time there than you are. I took off the vest.

Can you find the strip club?

I was reading through the SOS website about how strip clubs attract crime to neighborhoods. According to SOS they don't pay taxes either. Just out of curiosity I did a little research on line to see if I can this trend. A Stars Cabaret strip club open not too far from me. So I check the local crime statistics to see what kind of impact it has. After examining a few of maps I decided to make a test. After examining the maps for yourself, can you find where the strip club is? Note, these maps show all the crimes committed between March 2010 and February 2011. If strip clubs are ground zero for crime, it seems logical that crime should be the highest at or near where the club is.

First map is simple assault, because people always get in fights in strip club parking lots:

This one is sex crimes. Only crazed perverts frequent strip clubs

Strip clubs are fronts for prostitution! I know this because I read it on the SOS website.

This is for drugs. All strippers are drug addicts or going to become drug addicts.

DUIIs because everybody is always hammered at strip clubs

Disorderly conduct, just to cover other things like pissing in the parking lot and flashing cars as they drive by.

Can you guess where the club is?

I can't really draw many conclusions with these maps. The club doesn't seem to really be central to anything. I can't see any real impact. Perhaps I need to accumulate more data. But how could you separate crime from the club and crime from the mall across the street? I'll see if I can get data from before Star's Bridgeport opened and after it opened.

The problem I have with the SOS website is they throw up a bunch of unsubstantiated claims then run with them as if they are scientific facts. Their first claim is the clubs "avoid paying taxes". Do strip club owners cook the books? Undoubtedly, but do strip club owners do it any more than other businesses? I don't know myself. But without any quality studies I can't make or refute the statement. To make a naked assertion without facts is completely unethical.

They treat workers as independent contractors to avoid employment taxes and fair employment laws. There is some truth to this. It seems to me it be better to actually deal with unfair practices rather then just jettison the whole thing. I'm wonder if they are so concerned about the working conditions of the people who make their clothes or electronics.

Strip clubs also do nothing to maintain their buildings or grounds ignoring county and city codes. Exactly where do they get the data for this? I did a survey of clubs for health department inspections. The clubs were all over the map but they all passed. This accusation is just made up. If they are going to try and change the laws they should base their arguments on real data. These are laws that affect peoples lives. They shouldn't be based on made up data.

More thoughts on pricing

I was originally going to post this blog in the form of a debate: Customer vs. Dancer "What should the price of lap/couch dance be?" I was going to try debate a dancer via e-mail. I would start with a statement and make a short argument. Then send it to her for her to argue back. Do that a couple times, then blog the result. When I began to outline my arguments one thing became apparent: I had no moral grounds for my arguments. By saying prices shouldn’t go up, I’m basically saying dancers should make less money. As the cost of living goes up dancers have to work more to maintain the same level income. That kind of killed my enthusiasm for the debate. I’ll try to think of something else. Do any Dancers have any topics they’d like to debate with a customer?

I still put some time into the subject and will post my thoughts. In my opinion, one major logistical issue preventing prices from being increased is the current denominations of money. A stage tip is still a buck. It was a buck in the 1980s when I went to my first strip club. This is nearly three decades (at least) of a frozen price. The next denomination up is the two dollar bill. More practically it’s a five dollar bill. Two dollar bills represent less than 1% of the money currently in circulation. Requiring two dollars would work just as well. The problem is that that is a 100% increase in pricing. There is no intermediate step

Couch and lap dances don’t have quite the same pricing shock. A five dollar increase is a substantial increase but not extreme. There are barriers to raising prices but nothing overwhelming. The real barrier (in my opinion) is the club owners. I’m sure all the dancers reading this are rolling their eyes as I state what is hugely obvious to them.

The dancer work situation with the club owners is peculiar. The idea of contracting out space or time from somebody else isn’t unique. Conceptually it isn’t much different from a vendor renting space at a Saturday market or a sports venue. This includes setting prices. What is hugely different for dancers is they actually have to compete with people who they are paying stage fees too. Every dollar that customer spends on drinks, food, or cover charge is a dollar he is not spending on the dancer. Most guys don’t have separate budgets for drinks and dancers. Dancers are all at once: a customer, employee and competitor with the club owner.

The customer/employee relationship is exactly the same business relationship I have when I do a trade show. They tell me when and where I have to be and when I have to show up. Part of the contract with the exhibit hall is that people will be present to operate the booth. They also have rules of conduct. If you show up late or act like idiots the exhibit hall can kick you out of a show. The only time I’ve seen somebody kicked out was for problems with payment. I’ve walked onto the show floor to start up the exhibits and the booth next to us is gone, now replaced with a 30’ x 30’ piece of blank carpet. Exhibit halls will put up with a lot except not getting paid. However, if the Exhibit hall tried to compete for my customers I’d blow a head gasket.

I don’t see pricing changing soon. There is no real incentive for owners to increase the tip or dance prices. It potentially cuts into the owner’s revenue and gives customers a reason to visit clubs that have lower prices. The owners are actually better off keeping the price low. I’m not sure how you would encourage the owners to raise the prices. It would take some sort of worker's strike. Unfortunately, as long as there is an endless supply of new dancers there won’t be a way to increase the price. The one dollar tip at the rail and the $20 lap dance have become the token amount.

I think most dancers look at their job as only temporary situation. They really don’t consider it a long term possibility. Because of that they are more willing to accept the pricing controls. I’m willing to fight for major changes in my career. I’m not going to take on an employer for a job I don't plan on keeping.