You can’t. Just quit right now. I don’t get asked a lot of questions on my blog, but this question comes in more than any other. Why can’t you get a stripper to date you? The question is fundamental flawed. The question makes the assumption that there is something special about dancers. That there is some sort of secret trick that will always work. How do you ask a stripper out? How do you ask a waitress out or how do you ask a doctor out, it’s the exact same problem. What a person does for a living does not define who they are.
There are a thousand things you can do to make a dancer not want to date you. One of the best ways to make sure a dancer will never go out with you is to try and ask her out. Most clubs have rules against dating customers. You are a customer which means that her primary interest is to make money of you. That last fact can sometimes really hard for some customers to accept. Most people will decide what they want to be true then only acknowledge the things that confirm the belief and ignore the things that deny it. Unfortunately for dancers aspects of their job will lead guys to think they are interested in them. I suppose they are interested in their actually interested in some of their customers, but as customers not dating material. However, there are customers will just notice things like she pays attention to him and ignore the other things like she is doing this because she pays him.
Despite the overwhelming odds against dating a dancer it does happen. I can speak from personal experience, having dated a couple of girls who also danced. So here is my two step method on “How to get a stripper to date you”. Step one: hang out at the same club for six years. During that time never do anything that can be remotely creepy. If you do you’ll have to wait another six years. You could get a master’s degree in that time if you’re industrious, or at least a bachelor’s degree. And it would probably cost less too. During the six years you must tip well as not to look like too much of a tight wad.
If you make the six year probation period, you still can’t do anything. But by now you’ve probably established the reputation of being a normal person. Why six years? By this point most of the dancers you were a jerk too have moved on and the ones that are left you’ve probably tipped a couple of thousand dollars so they more inclined to look on you favorably. Now step two: all you have to wait to meet a dancer who has similar interests as you, you get along with, and also find’s you attractive. This will probably take another couple years. It would probably be much more effective to go some where else to look for a date. Seriously, it’s a strip club not a dating service.
For those of few of you who still read this blog, thanks for being patient. I’ve had a few medical issues recently. It sucks getting old. I’ve seemed to have resolved everything so I’ll return to my usual blogging routine. At least I’ll post more than once every six months.
There are a thousand things you can do to make a dancer not want to date you. One of the best ways to make sure a dancer will never go out with you is to try and ask her out. Most clubs have rules against dating customers. You are a customer which means that her primary interest is to make money of you. That last fact can sometimes really hard for some customers to accept. Most people will decide what they want to be true then only acknowledge the things that confirm the belief and ignore the things that deny it. Unfortunately for dancers aspects of their job will lead guys to think they are interested in them. I suppose they are interested in their actually interested in some of their customers, but as customers not dating material. However, there are customers will just notice things like she pays attention to him and ignore the other things like she is doing this because she pays him.
Despite the overwhelming odds against dating a dancer it does happen. I can speak from personal experience, having dated a couple of girls who also danced. So here is my two step method on “How to get a stripper to date you”. Step one: hang out at the same club for six years. During that time never do anything that can be remotely creepy. If you do you’ll have to wait another six years. You could get a master’s degree in that time if you’re industrious, or at least a bachelor’s degree. And it would probably cost less too. During the six years you must tip well as not to look like too much of a tight wad.
If you make the six year probation period, you still can’t do anything. But by now you’ve probably established the reputation of being a normal person. Why six years? By this point most of the dancers you were a jerk too have moved on and the ones that are left you’ve probably tipped a couple of thousand dollars so they more inclined to look on you favorably. Now step two: all you have to wait to meet a dancer who has similar interests as you, you get along with, and also find’s you attractive. This will probably take another couple years. It would probably be much more effective to go some where else to look for a date. Seriously, it’s a strip club not a dating service.
For those of few of you who still read this blog, thanks for being patient. I’ve had a few medical issues recently. It sucks getting old. I’ve seemed to have resolved everything so I’ll return to my usual blogging routine. At least I’ll post more than once every six months.
Good blog. At first, because of the title I thought. "Oh No, Did you just betray a trust?" lol After reading it, I figured you chose the Title to get those who are in fact trying to date strippers to read it. Just my opinion, because I kind of try to write blogs with a similar focus. Here is an example. http://inscriptions-of-art.tumblr.com/post/4751146667/east-to-talk-to. I love the 6yr bit by-the-way. :) I am glad to see you'll be writing more often, I enjoy reading your stuff. Sorry you've had some medical issues to deal with, hopefully that's all done with.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWelcome back to the blogosphere.
ReplyDeleteWhile the likelihood of dating a stripper is, IMO, not quite so infinitesimally small as you imply, it's true that unless you are richer than God, your chances are miniscule. Ask yourself: what would motivate a stripper to turn a regular paying customer (who she may actually sort of like) into a real-world date? Once you cross the line into OTC, it's unlikely you'll ever get him back for lap dances... those things that actually pay the bills.
Nevertheless, I've clicked once or twice over the years. But in my experience it takes tons of patience, a boatload of luck, a high level of trust, and heaping gobs of financial recklessness. The most valid and valuable part of your post is the implied question: "Why bother anyway?" Your chances of bagging a pretty shopgirl or waitress seem significantly better, and probably won't result in you waking up in a hotel room in Vegas with a Bengal tiger eying you menacingly as he paces around your bed.
It seems that customers are not aware that we are specifically told (by management) to NEVER date customers. We are warned that the money will disappear and we will get fired. In addition, it's just really difficult to be in a "personal" mindset when I'm at work, dancers are extremely business oriented but the societal mindset is that we're "party girls". I'm there strictly for business, single or not. I have a little saying that starts, "Even if Brad PItt walked in here..." because the bottom line is that it doesn't matter WHO walks into the club, I'm there to work, not to date. I really appreciate that you brought up spending money. Every blog titled "How to date a stripper" strongly advises one to not spend a dime so that the stripper will "respect" you. In actuality, the only way a customer would even have a chance is by spending money. But not for reasons that one would think. We're not greedy, superficial women who can only respect a man through his wallet (as I know the author is aware) but we see it as a sign of RESPECT when a man is spending money on us at work because it shows that he realizes this is a job for us and that we are selling our time. Someone who's romantically interested in me has no chance in hell with me if he thinks he can get my time for free (while I'm working). So I love that you brought up that point and I also agree that this subject needs to be dropped because yes, it's a ridiculous quest to try to date a stripper. We are all either married or too focused on our own success in life to bother dating someone who saw us nude before they knew our real name.
ReplyDeleteI've frequented strip clubs for over twenty years and the truth of the matter is the girls are there primarily to make money to pay rent, car notes and so on. In most casses they are not there seeking companionship or casual sexual relationships and many are single moms. Most strippers are already in relationships with boyfriends / or pimps or other women in some cases. The best advice is to in a club with an idea of what you will drink and your spending limit. Sit at bar or away from the bar; not at the stage you'll look pathetically desperate. Be clean reasonably well dressed. Don't buy dances from every girl that walks up. If she strikes up a conversation and you're not that interested tip her a dollar or two. Never buy a dancer a drink if she has just met you. To get rid of a dancer tell her to come back later. Stay in control. Most dancers don't "date" customers. Getting to know a stripper or dating her for that matter can be a time consuming and expensive process. Don't spend too much time or money on a dancer that does not respond to your advances. Cut your losses and keep your money in your wallet.
ReplyDeleteThis blog really helped me out man! Much appreciated.
ReplyDeleteI have so far passed the 6 year mark and just finishing the other 2 years. I am happy to report that I am now talking to the girls in the club about things other than 30 minute lap dances, and I think this blog is the reason why. Maybe I'll get a hug by the end of the year. If so, I'll let you know!
I met my dream girl at a strip club. She proved herself with a kiss. Yes, I spent money getting to know her, but I knew the minute I looked in her eyes that she loved me. On my third visit (one month after meeting her) she left the club with me (I went down on her in VIP and she secretly came, I learned months later). On Valentines Day she took me there as her date and showed me off, so it's not forbidden everywhere. But you need to be someone who can date hot women outside strip bars too. It's not easier with strippers just because you got to see their boobies already. Maintaining them requires you to be someone who is so confident that jealousy does not exist. You actually want them to leave because other women like you too. Give her too much space. But always treat her like a lady.
ReplyDeleteI think there is much more potential to date someone who dances from outside the 'world'. I have dated 3 strippers before i knew they we stripprts. It is difficult or impossible to enter their world but from outside it is actually easy. Single mother groups, babysitting clubs and just being involved.
ReplyDeleteThe point to remember is, women who strip for a living are messed up in some way. Is this what you want to be around? Bad boyfriend, bad step-dad, bad friends. They didn't grow up wanted to be naked in front of old guys.
You can find something better. Just look around!
Good posts. I think that some women I met I could of had a friendship with with benefits, in strip clubs. But if they are making 1000 a night of whatever than I don't think they will just quit there big ass salary for a guy. I think they will put money before u. If there wasn't alot of money in it, then maybe ud have a better chance. I would prob just get there number and talk to them here and there. Once every few months. And next thing u know she quits her job, and u start a relationship. Stripping might only last 2 years or shorter and then they may never do it again. Idk who knows but if the girl is superhot and ur just avarge guy then I would keep ur money for better things.
ReplyDeleteGotta admit tho it can't be safe for u too date a stripper. Not saying there whores. But that is not a good place for u. Why take the chance and gamble with a stripper. That's not wise.
ReplyDeleteIm a strip club dj. That being said, its almost impossible not to date a stripper for me. Regular girls dont want a guy thats around naked women all day. So i gave in, and claimed one for my own. Shes a knock out. The sex is amazing. But just like every other stripper, shes a bipolar bitch, all she cares about is money, and she has done some unforgiving things. But at the end of the day, she is an awesome companion, and she loves me. Gotta take in the bad with the good. Trust me, i dated a lot of strippers, and i wouldn't recommend it. But for someone like me, i really have no choice. It's either be alone, or be with a whore. Now it burns when i pee, but i'm happy :)
ReplyDeleteYeh...its funny how all these posters who have "dated a bunch of strippers" and apparently have returned to the honey pot again and again and love it tell the rest of us "Don't date strippers!"....
ReplyDelete