Songs I'd like to hear in a strip club

Here are some songs I'd like to hear in a strip club but never have. These songs predate most dancers by a decade so it isn't too surprising. Dancers should add them to their play list on occasion. You might make some old guy's night.

A cool Tubes song other than "She's a beauty". This was actually a pretty innovative video when it came out.

This is one of the few disco songs I liked in the 70's. You gotta love the video toaster special effects.

I can also remember when punk rock was the most shocking thing on the radio.

I still love puck rock despite being nearly fifty

Alan Parson's music maybe severely over produced, but songs about Edgar Allen Poe stories are inherently cool.

I know this song has no beat, but its still one of my favorites

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Still don't know why I don't hear more Queen in strip clubs. Great theatric music. Killer Queen doesn't get as much air play as the others.

Exit poll

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Really Ugly Betty

When I first started writing this blog in 2007 dancers used to be really interested when they found out I wrote a blog about strip clubs. Now, telling a dancer I have a blog is like telling them I have a belly button. I’m sure they’re happy I have one, but they don’t want to see it. Now I have to up my marketing by telling them I have a blog that was mentioned in Maxim magazine recommended as a must read. To backup my bullshit I decided to see if I could find an electronic version of the article for my cell phone. Yea, I know that sounds desperate. One thing that kind of sucked about the Maxim article is they put down the name of the blog, not the URL. The only people who found my blog are the ones that went searching for it.

I was searching for my electronic ego stroke when I found this piece of internet tripe. The article was on a site called “Betty Confidential”. It was about what they discovered about the way men think from Maxim magazine. You can learn a lot about 50% of world’spopulation from a magazine that has an article on “How to beat up Bigfoot”. Not. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that a site that makes gross generalizations about men should make gross generalizations about strip clubs. It's amazing they were able to compress a bunch of stripper stereo type's into a single paragraph and a couple comments. Here’s the section about stripper blogs.

“3. They like to read strippers’ (yes, strippers) blogs.

The October issue of Maxim features a list of “must-read blogs” penned by pole-dancing honeys. Apparently, it isn’t enough for guys to see them slide down a pole anymore – they need to read about it, too. The blogs include hobostripper.com, angrystripper.wordpress.com, katstories.tumblr.com, and more. Quick, go check your guy’s browsing history now to make sure none of these sites are on it.”

First thing that strikes me about this is that they either didn’t read any of the blogs or didn’t bother to give them any credit. Most guys would benefit from reading these blogs. You will get a serious dose of humanity from them. The last line is absurd: "Quick, go spy on your boyfriend and get really upset if he's reading about people's real life experiences". I suspect that actually reading the blogs would shatter their precious stereotypes that makes them feel superior.

I tried to leave a comment on the blog. I even signed up for a “Betty Confidential” account. I took the low road. I pointed out that if your relationship was so shaky that even reading about strip club blogs was a problem, it was doomed anyway. Then I pointed out that most of the blog writers have college degrees. It comment didn't appear on the site. Either I didn’t fill it out correctly or they deleted it. In any case, I didn’t try very hard.

The comments are just as bad: “Thang?” Barf. I don't think there are any branches on her family tree. (Que banjo music). The second comment is just condescending and ignorant. Seriously, stripper = illiterate, LOL? That's pathetic.

#1. CityLady212 on 10/08/2010 - 1:49 pm (EDT)

That's interesting about the oral sex thang!

#2. ChattyCathy on 10/08/2010 - 4:56 pm (EDT)

LOL stripper blogs??

I guess you get what you pay for. I always wondered where the writers who couldn't make the grade at Tiger Beat went to.

Recycling

It’s always a little questionable whether a retiring dancer is actually going to retire. Things change after they hang up the heels. They may find themselves in a situation again where they need to start dancing again. Hearing the name of a “retired” dancer called to stage can generate a surprisingly emotional response in me.

If it’s a dancer I didn’t like, it will put my teeth on edge. It’s like sitting in class the first day of school and discovering the kid you really hate is going to be sitting next to you this year. Going to a strip club is an emotional experience. It can be lust, friendship, affection, acceptance, or any other one. You don’t walk out of strip clubs with anything (except a lighter wallet). You go there for the experience. Sometimes it’s a negative emotion. I’ll watch the stage to see if the dreaded dancer has returned. Fortunately there are only a few dancer I’ve ever really hated.

Seeing a dancer return is almost always a good thing. It’s sort of like accidentally running into a friend you haven’t talked to in a while. There is a gloomy side to it as well. When most dancers retire they are moving on in their life to something new. Usually, it’s a new career, relationship or something like that. If she's dancing again something has probably gone wrong. The relationship didn’t work or the new job didn’t pan out. It’s not a sign of failure, but it’s probably not what she wanted to do again.

When you hear the dancer’s name called and somebody completely new walks on stage, it’s sometimes a sad thing for me. A new dancer taking over a name is kind of the official end of the old dancer’s tenure at the club. You are not going to see this person again. You’ve just lost a friend. Sometimes a dancer will give you an e-mail address or something like that. It’s difficult to maintain a relationship outside the club. I suppose that this is another sign you’ve been a customer at strip clubs too long when just hearing a name can affect your evening. Sometimes it just a name, sometimes it more. Your only connection to the person is just a made up name. When you lose the name, you lose the person.