Come here often?

If there is one thing I can empathize with dancers is the task of making conversation with people I normally wouldn't. It's probably the toughest part of the sales process for me. When a dancer sits down with me for the first time it's always interesting to watch her approach. I have to do the same thing in my jobs. I walk up to people and start conversations at trade shows with intention of getting something out of them. I don't have to make a sale, but I have to find out assorted information about any projects than may lead to potential sales. In the process of this I have endure lengthy conversations feigning interest about things I could care less about.

The "wanna dance" girls are annoying. They just clog over to my table ask for a dance, then wander off to the next table when my answer is no. I call these zombie dancers. More than just the humorous description, it also points out the worst thing about this approach, it is completely devoid of personality. As harsh as this sound's, the girl is simply presenting herself as a commodity. Outside of her looks there is nothing to separate her from the rest of the crowd. Except for anatomy there is nothing to relate to. They've turned themselves into mindless zombies wandering around the club with no spark of life.

From the zombie dancer the next step up is the check list dancer. These dancers will sit down and talk to you, or more accurately talk at you. They sit down next to you, being sure to press their knee against your leg. They will then start down a check list of questions. "What's your name? Where do you work? What do you do? Do you live around here? Have you come in before? What are you drinking? Do you want a dance?" Not always in that order. They just rattle off a set of questions like they are going down a check list. They don't listen to any of my replies they just go to question to question. When I say no, they usually get up and walk away, though some will huff and make some sort of remark like "Thanks for nothing" and stomp off. They never deviate from the list. I have to give them credit for at least getting to the next level. But they still make you feel like a walking wallet.

Most dancers will try to establish some sort of connection with you. They'll start out with the usual line of questioning, but they actually listen (gasp). Instead of just asking what do you do, they follow up with do like your job, how did you get into that line of work etc. The illusion that somebody is interested in you will help create a bond. In my past experience there are the three Ps when it comes to trying to start a conversation with someone: Planes, Pets, Profession. These are safe subjects that usually one is of interest. Profession is the easiest for me to talk about, but some people not so much. Pets are always a good subject. To a lot of people their pets are the children and will happily talk about them for hours. There are several dancers I always ask about their pets. Planes or travel is usually a hot button for a lot of people. Most people have some sort of horror story about a cancel flights or obnoxious airline personnel.

Some dancers are exceptionally skilled at the process. They can sit down with you and a minute later you feel like you've known them forever. One thing they do better than most if pacing. I've gone to seminars where the discuss pacing. This is the process of matching you habits and speech pattern with somebody you are talking to. You are supposed to match there pacing when you talk to them. If they stop to drink, you stop and drink, if they pause, you pause. I'm not very good at personally, I tend to get impatient and try to complete peoples sentences for them.